The Foundation?

You can go on the street and ask however many people you want to ask what is the foundation of a successful, long lasting relationship... Im sure you'd get as many interpretations as a sunday school doing silent study of Bible scriptures. Im also sure you'd get a few that are pretty common like Honesty, Trust, Compromise, and Hard Work and thats because they are key.

Before a construction crew can even lay one brick or concrete slab, a survey of the land and soil samples must be taken to see if the land is suitable. In my opinion this is where "Honesty" comes in to play. Sure that land may look like a great place build that Beautiful home of your dreams but if there is unsuitable soil how is that foundation going to support what you build upon it?

Once the surveying and samples are sound it gives the construction team a sense of "Trust" in the land and building can proceed. This would be dates and the getting to know you time frame of relationship. A problem with too many relationships is they are too rushed. Before a sample and survey results even come back the construction managers are already at home depot picking up there cheap inexperienced day laborers. A quality build project takes time people! A poorly put together foundation can reap your now beautiful home expensive problems in the long run!

If everyone had it their way they would have the perfect home of their dreams, but lets face it folks reality is not perfect and neither are people. With a construction project budget is key and if the budget is limited compromise is an unwanted but need factor. In relationships your significant other is like the budget, it is what it is! Unfortunately their is no going over budget with a person so if that budget is something you can deal with your just going to have to compromise and deal with out some things of that "Dream Home" you had imagined. Never take on a budget you cant handle, you'll just be left with an unfinished lot sure to be vandalized.

"Hard Work," no one said building on that foundation would be easy! With a construction project there are going to mistakes, mishaps, and misjudgments, as project build continues these will happen and its going to take hard work to fix them. If your not willing to do that well don't even bother with surveying the land. Also if your one of the lucky few to complete that build, the hard work does not stop there. In 10 years time things like appliances, pipes, etc. begin to fail, its you and yours job to fix them. Notice I said you and YOURS emphasis on yours because it should not be only you pulling all the weight in the relationship. If you find your self making all the decisions on your own to help maintain that home you worked so hard to build then that my friend is a problem. Your problem is Dead Weight and we all know what happens to dead things, THEY GET BURIED (in the back yard) !!

So to wrap this up for you all living in your beautiful home or in the process of construction ask your self this, "Is my foundation sound?" If not you need to see is it worth the Repair or Demolition???

Why are you my friend again?

You ever have that friend that you keep around, but you just don't know exactly why you do? Well I have a friend like that since I have become one of the masses to join the line at the unemployment office we have become pretty close. Actually its kind of amazing how close we have become because he's not much of a talker but he's always there. We've shared many a emotional conversation too. You know my other friends always would ask "Watu why do you even entertain him? He's so negative." Yeah I listen to the advice but its just something about him. Not one to drop names normally but his name is "Defeat." I keep him around because makes me stronger.

The Future of Gay Dating

If you look at the history of personal computing, although change is the norm with technology there are also some constants. As technology has progressed hard ware has become more powerful, smaller, and faster. Over the years the personal computer has gone from large desktop to now small smart phones more powerful than yesterdays computer. The same applies to websites, if you've noticed we have gone from complicated social sites such as Black Planet (BGC Live.. cough cough) with its multiple pages to streamlined sites such as Face Book which can give you an information overload all on one page. Welcome to the new phase of social sites, smart phone only social sites that is. In 2009 a new company called Grindr jumped in to the application development and membership has jumped to 500,000 iphone users in a years time. Now instead of going and filling out long and tedious membership forms you cans simply put a few lines about you name, age, pic and your done. With GPS, Wifi, or cell phone tower location you can meet other Gay guys with in miles or even feet. Start a quick chat agree to meet up and the software will provide the actual location of your future friend (because it skews the actual location of you to protect you from possible threats of gay bashing) or one night stand. Unfortunately Grindr at the moment is only on the iphone but because of the overwhelming popularity a similar program has been created for the Android operating system (i.e. Nexus One, G1, Droid, HTC Hero, MotoBlur). Encountr recently released on the Android Market mirrors Grindr, the only drawback is that its new so the base has not grown as much! Search; Android Market: Encountr http://www.encountrapp.com/ Iphone App Store: Grindr http://www.Grindr.com/

How hard it is to be loved by one, yet feel so alone...

Your presence dissipated the cold of the season and warmed my heart when we first met..

Big beautiful brown eyes stare in to my soul..

We grab hands and you pull me away to a bright, beautiful, calming place..

As the season change we go from 2 to 2 halfs to 1...

We are on the same path...

Or at least we were..

Love can be so Naive..

These days I finished 2nd in the race for your heart..

I thought I was first but maybe that was the naivety in me..

3 seasons have come and gone and the cold has come again but yet there is no warmth this time..

I have always been attracted to the driven..

And thats you...

But I've learned something about the driven..

Thats just It they're driven and that came before me...

The Obama Effect?...

So last night I was in bed with my babe (who shall remain nameless) and we're watching The Color Purple (my first time ever and im 25), when we see a commercial for a new show on Black Exploitation Television also known as BET. The commercial was for a new game show called "Pay It Off" and in the ad the title was in front of a Credit card. Does anyone see the problem with this or is it just me being highly sensitive to black stereotypes. Well anyway this raised the question in my head, Have black people regressed since the swearing in of the first black president (actually bi-racial)?

I mean lately it just seems like there is less of African Americans during prime time and more of us on during news time. CW formally known as UPN (aka Under Paid Negro-Network) had a full line up of black sitcoms and the last one standing "The Game"was canceled in 2009. Although I did not personally watch the show, many of my friends were huge fans of the sitcom and not even countless petitions could save the show. Currently the only African American prime time show on network television is The Cleavland Show on FOX, a cartoon.

As far as the news goes African Americans as a whole are not really looking so hot. One of biggest stories in the news right now is about Derrion Albert, a 16 year old honor student murdered as a bystander of a gang fight in Chicago. As sad but common as this story is, for the media to plaster the video online of this young boy's murder is downright disturbing and disrespectful to the family of the victim.

Since Obama has taken office you have seen racism in a much more in your face manor than before. We all saw the McCain rally's with chants of "N-gger and Kill Him" during the election process. I my self endure racial slurs each time I go on Blog Tv a site devoted to video bloggers who want to chat live with their viewers. Being called the N-word and other racial slurs is all too common!

So I ask you this have blacks sacrificed integrity in the media spotlight in order to have a black (bi-racial) president? I think many people have had this false hope that with Obama taking office that everything would simply get better for African Americans, but as an African American I realize that in order for us to stop being stereotyped we must stop feeding the stereotypes. We need to start thinking its cool to speak proper English, read books, further our education, and aspire for better lives. It irritates me when I see my people settle for shows like Real Housewives of Atlanta, Tiny & Toya, Frankie & Neffe. Although they have money they still reflect a ghetto mentality that uneducated African Americans seem to pride them selves on. Where is today's Cosby Show?

The F#ck that just wont go away!!

How dare you try to play me b@tch, try to make me look like some angry and bitter person over you. Hmmph I do think so! I have known you for far to long and have tried to distance my self but some how some way, you always seem to weasel you way into my life. Go away I say, you seem to think that we are friends but in reality to we nothing more than F%ck buddies who failed to be.. Failed to be something more that is, you I vert good at seeing through people motives. Call me Cleo b#tch because I see through you clearer than a Brita pitcher can clean up muddy water. Your not fooling me because I will check that A$$ like Sheree's failed party planner. So don't try to play me as some angry bittier person over you when simply you and I were nothing more than a good fu$K! Do me a favor and get out of my life because I have moved on and your just confused about who you are and what you want!!! THIS RANT IS DONE!

Tear a Piece Put One Back!

Okay so I have learned some things being in the corporate world and been shocked by some things as well, but this just irritates the hell out of me. So in my office like many others around the world occasionally some one will bring in bagels, cookies, basically anything thats served as an individual item.

Why the hell do some people take there bare hands and tear a piece off then put the rest back in the pile. I don't know what the h#!! you've been doing with your hands before reaching for that bagel. Then to put the rest back to contaminate the others so we can intake your germs!! Thank you so much for being so giving, I'd just love to have your little Bobby or Jessica's cold. Your just to kind. I swear man some people can be so damn nasty and see nothing wrong with it, and I really wanted another bagel too...SMH